MIND. What Are You Holding On To?

I was traveling in India with two very wise friends. We were discussing the concept of surrender while hiking up from a dunk in the Ganges River. One of them shared a concept she had come across recently: the different ways in which can go about trying to hold a fistful of sand. What happens when you try grasping it to try and keep what is there? It does not work. More and more sand will slip out through your fingertips the tighter you clutch exactly what you are trying to save. Then try holding the sand with your palm facing upwards. No grasping. No clutching. Just holding. Nothing else to do but just allow what is there to remain by just holding it. Some wind may blow a few grains of sand from the top. But the sand largely remains much better than trying to grasp it.

I grew up with a sage of a mother telling me, “what you resist, persists.” I find this equatable to the irony of holding sand in your hands - the more you struggle and try, the opposite of your desired outcome becomes reality. Both concepts I see as an invitation to let go of whatever you (I) may try to be controlling. Easier said than done, of course. A continual practice.

So, if you are trying to hold onto something/someone: How tightly are you clutching? And what happens if you were to release that grip? Is there something you are forcing, or something you need to surrender to?

I like this thought meditation by Sarah Blondin titled Learning to Surrender. I also find much of her work peaceful, beautiful and thoughtful.

This can also be found on one of my favorite apps that I like to share with patients call Insight Timer.