SOUL. The Secret of Sacred Morning time.

A question to ask yourself: are you controlling your phone? Or is your phone controlling you?

A couple weeks ago I had a string of teenagers depressed, anxious and generally mentally unwell. My heart ached for them, but my mind brainstormed. A compromise was struck for at least couple of them that seemed doable: changing their morning routine.

What did that look like?

Sleep with your phone on airplane mode, ideally in another room. Not “do not disturb,” but quite literally stopping all signal transmuting. And put it out of sight. Then, in the morning, don’t turn it back on until 30-60 minutes after being up.

While I don’t have any hardcore studies to share, I do have anecdotal evidence. Admittedly, it is biased, because it is based on my own experience of doing this for the last 10 or so years. My scientific conclusion: it’s awesome and effective.

Instead of a frenetic start with an onslaught of messages or notifications, I engage with my smartphone when I am ready. After I have already had a great start to my day, I feel much more grounded, aware and capable of whatever dings, pings and rings the phone will throw at me. While I realize that this may not be capable for all parents or professions … it was at one time, wasn’t it? Pre-cell phone? That wasn’t all too long ago.

Desperation is the greatest spur of invention. These teens I saw were so desperate, they were willing to get creative and try something new. Could you benefit from doing something similar?

In our world of connectedness and immediacy, the sanctity of quiet or even unstimulated time is rare. But truly, it is sacred and necessary. Phones are often a distraction from our own distress to avoid looking at what is happening internally. For our own mental, spiritual and physical health, it is a simple experiment I believe all should try.